Wednesday, December 25, 2002 :::
what i need to do today is get cracking on motion to compel discovery/opposition to motion to quash.
+ second request for discovery.
possibly other filings including demand for jury trial.
::: posted by gt at 12:11 PM
it's been awhile. i have some notes for a disney blog entry.
today, christmas: snow. i weatherstripped some doors and windows, need to fix hole in front window. mostly of course i am doing nothing, just hanging out online. i'm pondering what to use to fix hole, i am going to try cardboard and caulk since i can't find the duct tape.
some high points of my xmas: 1) i got my neighbor totoro for denise and denephew. i hand it to her and she says "I hate that!" but so far she's watched it 3 times and wants to keep watching it.
2) danny sed merry christmas. he's 14, british. cute although our interaction is entirely aboveboard.
3) an actual xmas card, from zorry.
4) some nice seasonal mojo at wwdn.
low points: i was really bummed last night because between the weather (ended up 8 inches of snow) and me getting over the flu
i didn't make it downtown to give dannon his christmas stocking of coal. i'd gotten the stocking, the coal, the bike to go downtown with, just couldn't quite pull it off. similarly, older sister and the two non-cute cousins got a can of beans with a note that says may be exchanged for 4 presents of choice.. those guys are hard to shop for.
::: posted by gt at 12:09 PM
Thursday, December 05, 2002 :::
view web page button isn't working.
::: posted by gt at 8:34 PM
today: didn't get stuff written down for court tomorrow. did pay electric bill so won't be turned off. did collect rent from joell. did download a bunch of my wwdn posts to my wwdn blog, and even figured out how to revise the template to add links. did go to the site and try to cut weeds, failed. note joells birthday monday. did tell j. something really really stupid: sed i love you. that was inappropriate and i'll have to backtrack.j and i are pals and we are having fun flirting but
i can't make it into something it isn't and won't be. didn't: really eat anything today. had a little soup this a.m. i guess.
::: posted by gt at 8:33 PM
Sunday, December 01, 2002 :::
so thats smokey joanna mike his sister chris josh nick joell danny asshole (jesse) drunk punk, i know i'm leaving out half.
this feels like kim's game.. why can't i remember who all was there? oh my lesbian buddy april who still owes joell money., and her morphine-using pal, who are staying with josh. rodger and carrie. roger and carrie are a couple who's ex's are engaged to each other and pregnant. joe and joanie. they swapped like science fiction writers used to do. that's 15. i'm sure there were tohers, plus people there when i wasn't.
::: posted by gt at 3:53 PM
last night was a slow night at the party. who was there? smoky and joanna, who wil give my number to her sister cricket. mike and his sister who used to go out with smurf. chris, fresh out of 3 months in jail. plead to an arson he didn't do to avoid attempted murder... some kind of ex girlfriend owed money for pot so he stole some stuff kinda story. josh is back at hollywood bar, cleaning himself up a lot, still on woodruff, west drive now tho. joell and big nick left for awhile and i left early. noise till 6 am.danny and "asshole" as usual, they live there. that drunk punk kid, 19, annoying. kidd's boyfriend.no one had weed. comedy central is the new trend over there. south park was better than ok. saw the man show and jimmy kimmel for the first time, it's what i expected. i'm not into crankyankers, a show about naughty muppets.
earlier that day i checked out the burned house across the street. nothing. one mysterious locked room might be worth another visit. it's just a pantry but could have unburned food.
friday night crew included joell's cousin, one of the twins, pocas, mj, oren, nate of course, duke i think, small crowd watching tv. tara got me high and victor told her the whole story about how beth's boyfriend faces the death penalty in georgia, why victor spent a week in jail over that, that the guy's awol from the gaurd when he kills the two people who were helping him, crank at the bottom of all this.might be an interesting article there somewhere.
::: posted by gt at 3:50 PM
gettin actual work done today. i remember this stuff. useta do it a lot. i'm not doing the most imporant things first.
i did make an attempt to go through the steps: to do list, daily task list, prioritize daily task list.
i did the dishes, which is my -almost ready to work- ritual, and prepared some routine motions in my 3 campaign finance cases. 90% anyway. "the first 90% of the tast takes 90% of the budgeted time, and the last 10% takes the other 90%"
anyway it's possible i'll show up in court on tuesday with actual paperwork this time.
gotta call my ex. - another thing put off so far this weekend. today's the first day i've done anything.
::: posted by gt at 3:30 PM
i was lying in bed thinking. it's 6 am sunday.
i grew up thinking that i would be living in a commune of some kind. not alone in a shack in the ghetto. on the other hand, we have these virtual commuities now, and that's something. it's cold in here. this s less profound than it seemed when i was motivated to get up and write it down. but i'm so lonely. and confused. and out of place. will i ever have some kind of community? back to bed.
::: posted by gt at 2:58 AM
Friday, November 29, 2002 :::
friday after thanksgiving. my big accomplshment so far today has been to change some light bulbs.
2 hours to walk to the store and back and change bulbs. i also picked up coffee garlic a can of juice padlock.$12-15. my lot on gray looks ok. same routine as yesterday - sleep in, read a bit, waste time online. mentally composing H & H stuff but must get to point of writing it down.
::: posted by gt at 4:37 PM
Thursday, November 28, 2002 :::
www.wilwheaton.net 's been down all day. maybe they didn't pay the hampster bill. so instead of my usual routine of wasting all day at wwdn, i'm googling for wesporn.
::: posted by gt at 2:49 PM
thanksgiving carolers came by and i got a hug.
i'm having lentils broccoli squash and french bread for thxgvg dinner/supper.breakfast was coffee.
::: posted by gt at 2:41 PM
woke up 11ish. felt good. enjoying reading a heinlein novel. had a superficial happythanksgiving call to my mom and sister.
by now, twoish, i'm back in the stressing over h & h mode, angry, talking to myself. and of course not getting any of it written down, just stewing over it, repeating the same thoughts over and over. angry at my dad and angry at H & H. maybe what triggered it is i'm reading the howpunished group on yahoo. i belong to 300 yahoogroups and at least 100 of them deal with
childhood physical abuse issues. it's an obsession. sometimes it helps to "talk" to each other about this stuff online, sometimes it just drags it all up again.
i don't know whether i was born broken, and led such a sheltered life that normal childhood discipline was the main source of stress, and i was unable to handle any kind of stress, so that just happened to be the trigger,
or whether whether (oops) my childhood was so abusive that even a normal person would have been driven crazy.
I think the reality is inbetween; that there is a strain of madness that runs in our family, so cousin steve killed himself,
cousin charlie got his head blown off in a drug deal, cousin doug is an alcoholic, although most of the rest of us are math teachers or scientists,
but that growing up as dad's scapegoat was alot of pressure at least by today's standards; not every 16 year old gets hit with a belt, although many do.
i'm at it again talking to myself about an incident i remember from local crime watch meeting where the cop bragged about how he took a gun away from a girl and took her home to get her ass beat.
the connections between the governmental violence and the domestic violence are pervasive. i'm not just mad at my dad, i'm mad at lyndon johnson and the system that lets thugs like him rule over american citizens. but then again i've been reading heinlein :) suddenly i'm feeling alittle better. weighing options: get high, have more coffee, open another window?
i have to hit send very shortly or i'll time out. so [odd, i wrote "click" in brackets <>
and that text didn't show up on the blog]
::: posted by gt at 11:10 AM
Wednesday, November 27, 2002 :::
2:45 am thxgiving. heading off to read and crash. feeling better.
::: posted by gt at 11:43 PM
got home around 4. oh right, that was after i flunked the drug test and didn't get the job. wasted time at wwdn til 11 or so, then wasted time at gay.com til 2 (so far) gonna read some more heinlein then crash. i'm feeling better now. i was way upset around midnight, crying yelling talking to myself. the usual, the h&h thing. partly upset about thinking about it all the time nd not being able to get it written down. it was real good to to talk to nick about it today. he's been thru some of this stuff too.
it was a moderately productive day all in all. just kinda overwhelmed with emotional stuff. i wanna call mom and lindy tonight. maybe brooke, probly not.
::: posted by gt at 10:49 PM
well (yikes why does loading a gay.com chat room take 15 minutes) i started to come on here to be able to vent, but got caught up in rebooting. my stomach still hurts, but i'm no longer talking to myself and enraged/depressed/upset.when i lived with my parents my stomach hurt like that on a regular basis i thought it was just part of life.
today went ok. nick and i got a lot cut, the one one desmond that is why i wrecked my car last april 15th.
it's past midnight and i got no work-writing done, having a hard time getting started on that. oops this is sure to have timed out.
::: posted by gt at 10:30 PM
Tuesday, November 26, 2002 :::
Posted: Tue Nov 26, 2002 2:38 pm Post subject: Re: template
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I WANT: monkey lovin'
I HAVE: no bananas today
Je REGRET rein. or is it rien? i don't like rain much either.
I WISH:
I MISS: the food coop
I FEAR: the zoning thugs - marion county health department
I HEAR: you, mang
I SEARCH: google. daily.
LAST TIME YOU...
SMILED?: hippie walks right up to me and asks me for a smile.
he got it too. the nerve of that guy.
CRIED: 2 weeks ago. not about wrecking the car, not about being overcharged on the tow, but the sense of help/hopelessness.
BOUGHT SOMETHING: starter for 77 olds.
GOT HAMMERED? sunday a week ago.
KISSED SOMEONE?: did i mention sunday a week ago? josh was there. we didn't actually kiss this time cuz his boyfriend was there but there was meaningful eye contact.
HAD A DREAM?: that all people, i say all people, can walk the streets of ...
LAST THING YOU READ: newspaper. blogs. about to reread podykane of mars (sp?)
LAST MOVIE YOU SAW ON THE BIG SCREEN: star wars the prequel sequel
LAST PHONE NUMBER YOU CALLED: temp agency, junkyard
LAST SONG YOU HEARD: k d lang
LAST THING YOU ATE: lentils + coffee = breakfast
DO YOU...
SMOKE? see below
DO DRUGS?: see above
HAVE A CRUSH?: on jerbear's avatar
HAVE A BOYFRIEND/GIRLFRIEND: no. position available. write for disclaimers.
HAVE A DREAM THAT KEEPS COMING BACK?: george bush.
HAVE YOU EVER LOVED SOMEONE? yes.
STILL LOVE HIM OR HER?: yes, who she was.
HAVE YOU ANY GAY BISEXUAL OR LESBIAN FRIENDS?: a few. not having lesbians friends these days is rough. they seem to be the only ones to see the world clearly in a way that makes sense.
BELIEVE IN MIRACLES?: no and yes.
BELIEVE IT'S POSSIBLE TO REMAIN FAITHFUL FOREVER?: yes, if not to me.
LIKE THE TASTE OF ALCOHOL: i guess so. prefer to muck it up with juniper berries and quinine.
BELIEVE IN ALLAH: that's a secret.
HAVE ANY SECRETS?: No.
HAVE ANY PETS?: Teddy bears
GO TO OR PLAN TO GO TO UNIVERSITY?: Haven't touched a drop since 1998.
HAVE ANY BAD HABITS: Nun.
PIERCINGS?: No.
HAVE ANY TATTOOS?: No.
HAVE A BEST FRIEND I think so.
CARE ABOUT LOOKS?: Mine, no. Yours, maybe.
TRUST OTHERS EASILY: Gullible isn't listed at dictionary.com
LIKE SARCASM: If i told you, would you believe me?
TAKE WALKS IN THE RAIN: i'd rather not in november
SING IN THE SHOWER: no shower, no song.
HAVE ANY SCARS: nose, lip, scalp. shovel, hunting accident, fell off my hoppityhop.
-30-
_________________
nolan chart: 100/100 www.lp.org/quiz kinsey# pi earth first mars next
::: posted by gt at 12:47 PM
Friday, November 22, 2002 :::
how court went:
mixed bag.
201 eastern was scheduled for today. i wasn't at all prepared. granted continuance till 1/3 but said no further continuances
01/02/03 9 am and 1/3/03 9 am.
also have appearances on 12/03 and 12/06.
410 beville was dismissed.
body attachment recalled - i overslept yesterday and missed court.
did not have anything ready to file re 30 n hamilton
need to prepare counterclaim re 30 n hamilton.
need to do extensive discovery request for stipulations etc.
most interesting thing was he took under advisement request for jury trial on issue of damages.
so i could prepare a memo on right to jury trial under indiana const.
::: posted by gt at 10:06 AM
Thursday, November 21, 2002 :::
today: car stolen by last chance. the plymouth.
i was writing up the cpf bit for the box book. went downstairs, got out of the bath, what's that doing there. realized the microwave was gone. front door wide open. bike gone. dnky watch with broken band gone. some tools gone. h was thourogh. "some black guy" is all the description we got. no bike to get to court tomorrow if i have court tomorrow. i'm angry. partly because it doesn't even occur to me to call the cops. light bulb went out so i'm typing this in the dark.
should probably write nastygram re trespassing during theft of car.. did they have a warrant?
::: posted by gt at 10:54 PM
Tuesday, November 12, 2002 :::
court went fine. i showed up at the wrong time, after having joell get me up at 7:30.
a handwritten motion for a continuance was granted. dec 6. had diner homefries a chocolate coke and espresso at fountain square. looked into thrift shop. over railroad track through woods home. off to 40 tacoma.
::: posted by gt at 1:07 PM
Monday, November 11, 2002 :::
yesterday: tv and car self-destructed.
today: served with three more lawsuits.
had an anxiety attack this morning, continued from last night, based on worrying about trying to deal with the lawsuits without a car. haven't had one of those in along time. tried to deal with it by going back to bed, so got nothing done today.
::: posted by gt at 1:48 PM
www.cruftbox.com killer blog. it's 4:22 am. no sleep. i'd go get stoned, but i already did. 2 hours ago and ?? hour ago?
little dried up leaves all over the plant, not a great sign, i watered some more. i don't feel as bad as i did. roommates are being noisy.
::: posted by gt at 1:22 AM
Sunday, November 10, 2002 :::
part of what irks me is the unicorn didn't go all that well. boy i went to see was there and danced but didn't say hi or anything to me, even though the place was empty. neither did jax or aquarium.
but i got to meet _lucas__ (it'll come to me?- it came to me later when i saw a star wars attack of the clowns reference to george lookass) the emo guy from kareoke tuesday.
he suggests jimmy eat world. not cute, but nice. hope i'll see him again.
::: posted by gt at 11:46 PM
a few minutes ago i was crying briefly over loss of car and towing fee and thinking about court.
but it coulda been much worse.. the wheel could have come off while i was on the highway. i should have done a pretrip inspection and seen lug nuts were coming loose, if that's what it was. frame broke, so car is probably totalled. i'll see if jesse wants it. stomach hurts. stress and bad waffle house coffee. it's 2:40 but feels like 4:20..brb.
::: posted by gt at 11:43 PM
long time no entry. much to catch up on. i started a new blog, depressionjournal.blogspot.com
major events since last post: went to chicago for oral argument in majors v abell. election. very little work accomplished last 3 weeks other than chicago. tonight, unicorn, dumpster diving, wheel fell off car. $95 towing fee rip off.
will need to get cash to pay for work on other car. will need to walk to court tuesday. etc.
::: posted by gt at 11:40 PM
Sunday, October 13, 2002 :::
who all was here tonight? joanna nate joell's cousin joell jeff canary marina annabelle someone i didn't know jay patrick -
not bad for no party. we sat around and talked, which is unusual. nothing deep. waste of time but i was feeling lonely and depressed so i went over for awhile. joell paid another $100 of the rent.
now it's 4:35 am. it was 1:42 before.i'm lonely and depressed again. -this- far from crying. watching some not bad movie about a class of 87 high school reuinion.
::: posted by gt at 1:42 AM
Sunday, September 01, 2002 :::
test
note to self look this one up.
Anderson v. Hale, 2001 U.S. Dist. 6127 (N.D. Ill. 2001)
NLRB v. Midland Daily News, 151 F.3d 472 (6th Cir. 1998)
Facts: The plaintiff served subpoenas on AOL
::: posted by gt at 11:48 AM
test - blogger recovered my last post; all it said was "test".
just stopping in to note that i had a houseguest this weekend. zorry, who was the boy from california in
"the moose story". it was nice for us both to have company. he has moved to his dad's in milwaukee where he has a job but
no social life. we drank, smoked, long pauses with little conversation. saw the bourne identify, a routine spy caper flick made
non routine by starring matt damon. he liked hollywood bar und filmverks. i had little to say, and i think i was kinda rude in not being very huggy-touchy-feely, since it's not a sex thing between us anymore -he's put on alot of weight and has a different body type than when he was 17. he's still somebody i care about and am close to, in our own male-bonding-much-left-unsaid kinda way.
i felt like i should let him know it's not him; i'm the same way around my family etc, just have a hard time expressing myself in spoken words instead of online. he seemed a lot more comfortable than last time he was here.
so it was a happy time for me, just to not be alone for a change.
::: posted by gt at 10:43 AM
Wednesday, August 28, 2002 :::
mailbox full of h 7 h envelopes. various sizes.
they are taking apart 201.
bought a bike.
put motion in mail. $12 postage fedex. bought stamps.
::: posted by gt at 7:54 PM
Tuesday, August 27, 2002 :::
depression journal monday
10 am. threatening call from health department. wiped me out emotionally. anger, hopelessness. went back to bed, used some drugs,
gave up my plans for the day.
my big accomplishment was going to the local bodega for a rat trap, but they didn't have any so i got coffee and club soda. spent $8.
did first draft of motion to admit brief, and letter to hamilton county.
6:30 pm. kids smashed all the windows in my 84 plymouth. they got away.
::: posted by gt at 6:26 AM
Monday, August 19, 2002 :::
was composing a post on wwdn and decided to follow my own advice - tonight's meal is spinach in brown gravy.
::: posted by gt at 6:20 PM
Wednesday, July 31, 2002 :::
2ish, so the day's half over.
I called ellen fujawa and she called me back and we had a nice chat and made progress.
I made three looking for work calls, nothing.
I revamped the files section in /joellsparty and went over some of the mzw stuff so i'd be more ready to do a to-do list of what is the next step.
I wasted some time writing to www.jewishcheerleaders.com.
I will take a bath, have a 3rd cup of coffee, figure out how to blow the rest of the day, maybe outline a couple temporary injunction motions. and or go thru the bills finally.
NEED TO: find out when the hearing is about 201 eastern, draft a lawsuit.
6 pm edit:
sent email to fujawa. 1.0 hours. made a call re a job, will go tomorrow to register with yet another agency. that was the plan after all.
oh, and this time i was able to get into uncle willie's soapbox, so i have a new playground.
4-5 it was unbearbaly hot so i tried a siesta, got no sleep but a little rest.
::: posted by gt at 12:06 PM
called ellen fujowa left that message about having a hard time getting in touch with you. had the bicarb and the coffee.
i'm sure if there were pot in the house i'd use it. so far today i've done two of the things that would have been on my list if i'd made a list, so there's some potential for having a productive day.
::: posted by gt at 6:38 AM
stuff i could do today but won't, let's put it that way, might be less threatening than calling it stuff i must really must get done today.
go through bills.
call ellen fujowa 233 4386 .. damn! i can feel my stomach knotting up and i don't think it's hunger, i think the idea of facing these chores is bringing on the anxiety.
ick. ick. ick.
so even trying to rationally plan my day triggers defense mechanisms, so the only thing that makes me feel safe and ok is to do nothing and just vegetate like i did all week. at least recognizing that pattern is a good thing. i think about the year i was 21 and was doing this without knowing it, same as when i was a kid, as long as i had my nose in a book life wasn't so bad.
i guess i'll go read the paper and see if that relaxes me.
current dillemna is whether to have coffee with the paper .. i was drinking coffee all day long yesterday... think for now i'll try some bicarbonate of soda instead.
::: posted by gt at 6:24 AM
wednesday. woke up at 5 am went to sleep at 2. so maybe i'm not sleeping enough, not eating much, aren't those signs my depression is returning?
so far today i've added cases back in to the joellsparty page. maybe i'll get stuff done today - it's been over a week since i did any useful work. i should make a to do list and a dtl, i don't feel that motivated yet. wonder what the resistance is to an organizational task like that? i ended up not going out to kareoke last night, which means i never left the house except to take out some trash.
that means i probably never got dressed. today is wednesday but maybe i should treat it like its a monday, like it's time to wake up and get up and get motivated. i'm pretty sure i couldn't get back to sleep if i tried. of course, maybe i would sleep better if
i did something physical. spent yesterday wanting to get high. don't feel that way right now.
had one brief episode of the acute depression last week, it only lasted, no more than 20 minutes but it was my excuse to do nothing that day. i'm feeling alot of anxiety over the whole health department situation. they are about to tear down 201 eastern, and i had another threatening call from tom sitler yesterday.
::: posted by gt at 6:19 AM
Tuesday, July 30, 2002 :::
forgive me father, it's been two months, almost, since my last blog.
i've spent the past week at
http://www.wilwheaton.com
which is a very cool blog, but it never made me think of coming here to work on my own.
but then i followed a couple of links.. there's a fair amount of porn two degrees of separation from uncle willie's..
and wound up at a blog at http://www.jewishcheerleaders.com
guy is an ok writer and has a story to tell about his career in porn.
ugly as hell but that's not the point.
exactly what it was that made me come here, what i might have wanted to say, i don't remember.
but it's getting to be time to stop reading and start writing.
today is tuesday.
last night i was at the unicorn and fondled jackie a little. had the fourth gin and tonic which i'm not allowed to so today i was not hung over but woke up a little queasy. felt that way yesterday too but hadn't had a drink.
sunday i had a dozen nude guys over who wanted to have sex with me and all i could think about was wishing i could come back upstairs and read some more will or see if i had mail.
glad i found this site as there's nothing much new on any of the boards i'm following.
i'll stop here to keep this short enough that it might not get eaten.
::: posted by gt at 12:01 PM
Friday, June 07, 2002 :::
stupid blogger just ate my post. again! grrr! makes it pointless to contineu here????
::: posted by gt at 9:18 PM
test
::: posted by gt at 8:56 PM
test. stupid blogger just ate my post.
::: posted by gt at 8:56 PM
Tuesday, May 21, 2002 :::
blog 5/20/02
3:22 PM
phone $ 150
electric $200
water 155
transcript fee . $66
note, copied here because blogger isn’t working.
much later... ok i haven't been keeping up with the blog. typical. maybe later i'll fill in some of the spaces.
this would be a good day to blog. it was almost productive, interesting, exciting. almost.
i got a few things done...
sent in the payments on the phone water and electric bills that had shutoff notices. to do thaT, I HAD TO FIND THE BILLS, STAMPS,
rats, and checkbook. i found the checkbook by rummaging around on my bedroom carpet looking for any stay morsels of pot.
i ended up smoking two of the seedlings, using a candle and a broken lighter.
mailed some stuff to lawyers, stuff that was spozed to be mailed friday (3 days ago).
rode my bike downtown to mail them - if i'd done it sooner coulda just put it in the box.
stopped and paid for and got the transcript of the hearing in majors v abell.
i washed dishes - so that's done for May- and took out some trash.
the lawn mower store was closed when i went.
i got a kiss from what's her name who lived here for awhile. carrie.
she has a cute but drunk new girlfriend.
we would have bought pot if it were handy,
the last ally mcbeale episode was dull, then i went to kareoke at oz.
i went up to some guy - alex - told him he was the cutest guy there. well he was.
dannon, the dj, came up and said hi. i mumbled a minimal response.
you wouldn't know i'm desperately hot for the guy.
i mean, just look at that butt. http://www.gurlpages.com/gtbear/crews.html
been way too long since i've spanked him.
daniel and deborah sang, and we hung out a little.
that's about it for today.
well i left out the part where i played chess on yahoo and surfed porn for a few hours,
found a few pages of spank pics. ok
::: posted by gt at 12:28 AM
Thursday, May 02, 2002 :::
went to swill coffee and got ambushed, they held me down and made me smoke pot.
this is interesting.. first it lost this post, and then it recovered it for me. nice blogger.
::: posted by gt at 4:51 PM
test. just lost a 3 line post basicly saying i'd gotten nothing done yet today, especially if posting to usenet doesn't count.
annoying popsickle truck going by. all for now - off to swill coffee.
::: posted by gt at 3:10 PM
Wednesday, May 01, 2002 :::
rats! just lost a long entry about seeing aaron carter on tv, a few notes on sex and drugs. stupid blogger.
::: posted by gt at 9:22 PM
reposting after first try failed.
later thAT SAME DAY: (oops) i haven't gotten alot done today. haven't opened the file i'm working on, a brief to the seventh circuit
in one of my anonymous political speech cases.
instead, after reading the bad novel i mentioned below, i looked for online and found "the tale of genji", possibly the world's oldest novel, depending on what functional definition one uses of novel. but i couldn't really get into it.14th century japanese court literature. mybe i'll give it another try another time. maybe not.
then i looked for and found dr graper's grapenotes at http://www.grapenotes.com , a legendary collection of early online gonzo journalism, that i hadn't read for 20 years. yes, i was online 20 years ago, then off for 10 years, then back on.
got a phone call re ongoing negotiations for selling a vacant lot for $600. took the car parts to the shop for a valve job. looked to see how my garden is doing.some people came over and we smoked dope - i'd been doing pretty well all morning being sober, since i'm out and trying to cut back. yesterday i'd searched the house meticulously for an hour and finally found a roach to get a good buzz off of. recently read michener's "the drifters" and evely waugh's "decline and fall", one of those british boarding school farces.
i'm using reading as a crutch these days; when i have my nose in a book i don't notice being depressed. any day now i will break down and spend $5 to get a library card so i can check out a collection of vernor vinge stories. ordinarily i do not spend money other than car repairs and bills. roomate says he has a job and should have some rent for me soon. he moved in in january, hasn't paid rent yet, this is may. all for now.
::: posted by gt at 5:31 PM
test. isn't working.
::: posted by gt at 5:30 PM
so far it seems to be working; i can log in and out and the info is still here. i don't completely trust it.
::: posted by gt at 1:00 PM
silly posts are in reverse chronological order, makes it a bit difficult to begin at the begining. there's no built-in spell check here, so i am noticing lots of typos. all for now. i'll have to decide whether to edit out these "all for now"s or keep them as a catchphrase thingy.
::: posted by gt at 12:58 PM
seemed to go ok. there's a tension here between being thorough but dull, or creating great literature. there are 10,000 other bloggers out there. i suppose i'm my own audience - i'm 40 now, at 80 it might be nice to have this to read, if i can successfully back up my data. the intent is to preserve something for posterity. i'm convinced that the golden age is in front of us, space travel will allow population growth, billions of new marks er readers. maybe even intellegence enhancement to the point where people will have time to read more, and keep up with the information explosion. that's if i end up expressing anything of value, to the point where anybody would want to read this, maybe even encourage others to read it. that is, can i create memes with survival value.
meanwhile, it's beltane, midafternoon, and my mechanic is on his way over so we can take my cylinders to be bored out. or something, pertaining to the 84 mercury and its parts strung about my garage. all for now.
::: posted by gt at 12:56 PM
once upon a time... hi. gummi the bear here. might start keeping an online diary here. diary.. not quite right. journal maybe.
"memoirs." It's just that sometimes recently i've had these killer exciting event-filled days, but what with having no short term memory, if fades fast, and it's sad not having anyone to share my adventures with. i read a lot, and think, man i could write better than that. (this morning i read a really bad novel, john o'hara's "the instrument" @1967). i'd been keeping a sporadic journal at
communities.msn.com/joelsparty but bill gates ate it, it's gone. this should be a bit more stable.
all for now, this is just a test to see if the entries load ok.
::: posted by gt at 12:46 PM
